At least make sure they are 18
Why
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
