they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
