Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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