I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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