Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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