Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
