it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I AM VODKA MAN
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
