ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
