Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
