32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
