my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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