you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
