idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Randomize
