Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
You brought string cheese to the strip club
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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