We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
