Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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