A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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