i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize