I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
that is very illegal...i love you.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
