3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
