Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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