At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
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