What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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