some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize