we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize