How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
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