i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
