we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
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