Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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