come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
