Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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