well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
