I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
