So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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