so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
