Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Will exercising make me less horny?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
