Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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