Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
