ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I need to sanitize my soul.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
