Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
