I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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