I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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