The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
