porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
