did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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