is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
They are going to name an STD after you.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
