How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
