Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
And then my night got REAL pukey
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
