I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
So many bounce houses so little time
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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