just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
